Thursday, October 18, 2018

APATHY

I might have been more traumatized than I thought I was by Hurricane Maria.  This morning I had a slight urge to go through my ephemera, or rather what was left of it, and got somewhat excited as I riffled through it.  I have been waiting and waiting for the muse to find me, and I thought maybe she had,  but she didn't hang around.  I couldn't get going.  I have some ideas, but I just couldn't be bothered.    The memory of the Little Old House and the 4 friends who revitalized it, the thought of all it could have become, the visual and olfactory memory of the destruction of everything in the Gallery, and still, one year later, the sight of the damaged house, materials and art supplies, warped paper, and the hairless brushes that survived didn't help and just knocked me out.  What would I do with what I make anyway? I guess I'll wait some more and blame it on Maria, the heat, and lack of space. I could do something if I really wanted to, but creative apathy has set in.



Mait, Lene, Loni, Marian

Friday, July 27, 2018

A Scary Moment


So here I am after a scary moment at the Ottawa airport.  The Air Canada agent refused to allow me to board because he said I needed a visa to go to Dominica.  I was dumb founded at his adement declaration.  Smiling all the while, the little sh*t said that the Dominicans had made a mistake on my passport, dating my resident permit 2008 instead of 2018.  True, but I have been using this passport and this permit for 2 years with no problem.   I stamped my little foot, bared my teeth and gave him the evil eye as I loudly announced that it is the Dominicans problem, not his.  Time passed and I was now in danger of missing my connecting flight.  I was prepared to drop my luggage (too heavy anyway) and make a dash for it when the agent next to him told him to let me go. The rest of the trip was uneventful but uncomfortable.

Some advice:  go West Jet to Barbados, not Air Canada to Antigua...then on to Dominica

What a relief to land in Dominica, to see McDowell and have him take over and take me home.

A week later and I have settled back.  Nothing has changed much.  It is hot.  I have cleaned up the apartment.  The back garden became a jungle in my absence, the shelves in the shops are still bare except for the essentials, day to day living is a struggle, but the internet now seems strong and reliable, and I have seen my friends, Mait, Traci, Annika and the ladies in the market have heartily welcomed me home.

Monday, July 9, 2018

Being Home - Going Home


My time here in Brooke Valley is coming to an end.  I am going back to Dominica on July 21. Yes, Canada, Ontario, Perth, Brooke Valley, this old house  is lovely, clean, fast, efficient, pretty, friendly, familiar...all  good.  The variety and abundance is truly awesome. But it is not 'home'.

This stay here has been a miasma of resurrected, long put away memories as I have talked to people and packed up, thrown out and given away much of my stuff.  I have also spent a good deal of time sorting out and organizing .  When Nick and Samantha moved back here to Brooke (from the West), they brought their complete apartments with them, so there were (are) 2 complete apartments being stored in the space downstairs.  Plus Nick did a wonderful job of decluttering this household and its collection of 50 years of accumulated detritus.  I have gone through it all.

I took a friend's advice as I was doing this: handle each piece and make a decision about it and acknowledge the pleasure it gave.  Don't just toss it in a bin.  It is all important. Often it was heart tearing and difficult, but I am glad I took her advice.  Thank you Jennifer.  It took me a full year to clean out my mother's house and much of it ended up in a country auction and the land fill.  I do not want this.

I have not been able to move Hans to do the same, so his filing cabinets and book shelves remain dusty and crumbling monuments to the past and will be a burden on those who come after him. I understand his reluctance though.

I have not   been able to deal well with Rachel's various collections, photos, writings, drawings, cards, notes, diaries, stuffed toys,  a few clothes but I have strongly suggested to Anthony, Nick, Samantha , and Hans to have a ritual, cleansing  fire and send them on their way. They agreed.   It's been 23 years since she died, that would make her 39 today, and as Anthony said, she would not be happy to know that we (I) was hanging on to her through her material belongings. 

I have spent happy hours with a few good friends here in BV; Sarah, Anne, Jennifer, Barbara and Judy in Montreal, .  While I was in Montreal I renewed a dormant friendship with Barry.  I hope this relationship is now up and functioning again. 

I went with Peter and Karen to visit Harold and Jan. Not only was this a pleasant road trip but it was also a trip down memory lane.   It was good to be with them.
I see that Anthony, Nick and Samantha are doing the best they can and are making their way.  Hans is as healthy as he can be at this stage and continues to be wholly engaged in his projects, thinking, reading and writing.

I came back early May to do whatever I could for my family.  My intention was to stay for the BV reunion in August.  That's 4 months.  Can't do it and the family is OK.  I was making myself sick and everyone around me unhappy.  So...off I go.  I'll be back next year for my annual visit.  This being a family there are, of course, things pending.  Stay tuned!

Post Script:  When I googled what to do with unwanted CD's & DVD's google answered, "cut them up and make a disco ball". I'm sill laughing

My garden is gorgeous, Nick has revitalized it and I did a lot of work.  He has good landscaping plans for it.  It is now his to do what he wants, keeping the special peony, iris and daylilies





Saturday, January 6, 2018

Avocado

One of the good things about Gardening in the tropics is that you can garden all year 'round.  When the post office opened after the passage of Hurricane Maria the first thing I received were some seeds from Spring and Doug Norman.  All the tomato seeds germinated (planted October 21) and   I was able to give some seedlings away.  They are bearing now. 

Before the Hurricane I had planted, in pots, 2 large avocado seeds.  They were sprouting nicely on my veranda.  Then Maria hit.  She brought down a piece of twisted galvanized roof on them, but the piece got caught on the wall and so sheltered them. The day after the storm  I climbed over someone's old wet mattress and broken furniture that had been deposited on the veranda  to rescue them .  The leaves were torn, I nursed them, and they survived. One of them was a big, creamy, purple avocado. By December I saw that the roots were coming out of the bottoms of the pots. They had to go into the ground.  Usually we would take them up to McDowell's farm and plant them but the road is still clogged and not easily passable so I thought I would plant them in the back yard behind the old house.

Well, I didn't plant them myself.  I couldn't lift the pots, and I wasn't sure how close to the Bay I could put them, so I went into the Bar to find someone who could carry them for me.   There was a little old gnarled farmer from Pennville, (a garden gnome actually, big ready smile and one tooth, lower right) who was happy to follow me into the yard.  He found a huge dasheen plant behind the house that Maria had planted, fix it up, took its sprouts and put them in the ground, saying, "Oh, look, she has babies, I will plant them for you".  Now I have 3 dasheen.  Anyhow he quickly dug holes for the avocado trees (avocado are called pear), explaining why he choose to put them where he did. "Don't do anything (duh do nuffin')" was his advice, "She knows best".   Then he stood back, looked at them and said to me in a very serious voice, "She will be sad for 2 days because she doesn't know where she is now.  We moved her, but then she will find herself and stand up straight."

Dasheen

Avocado - 1 meter high. Will bear in 7 years

Tomato - I have a dozen plants
We have almond trees growing like weeds in the back.  His pronouncement on them was, "Dey doh give no profit, dey belongs on de beach".  True , but they do provide wonderful shade.  When the beach gets cleared up we will put some there.


This almond tree was 5 feet tall before Maria.  The hurricane cut it down, It is now 2 feet and will soon be tall and wide spread.  The bare tree behind is a St Peter's Tree (Flamboyant) and will be flaming red at the end of June.